The Art of Connection begins with your connection to yourself.
Knowing yourself is essential if you want to operate better in life.
When you understand what triggers or activates you—what I call “feeling activated”—you can address the root emotion. Words, memories, or beliefs that provoke discomfort often hold meaning only because you assigned it to them. Ask yourself: Why do these things make me feel this way? This curiosity leads you to the emotional root, offering the chance to release the reaction. Once addressed, similar situations or words won’t trigger you the same way.
Recognizing your triggers is a gift. Yet, we often focus on blaming the person who “poked the wound” rather than addressing the wound itself. Deep honesty with yourself is the key to living authentically and creating incredible connections.
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Everything Starts with You
The foundation of all relationships is the one you have with yourself. You don’t “find” love in someone else; that idea is a fallacy. You are love. When you embrace this truth, your need for relationships shifts—you no longer seek completeness, but connection and growth.
Relationships, especially intimate ones, are soul contracts meant for learning. They don’t “end”; they reach completion. Each relationship is an opportunity to reflect:
How could I have loved myself or my partner better?
What parts of myself sought validation or control?
What patterns am I still carrying that don’t serve me?
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Growth Through Relationships
Relationships are mirrors that reveal subconscious patterns and unhealed parts of ourselves. The closer you get to someone, the more these programs surface. Vulnerability becomes a strength—when you confront what you’ve carried, a loving partner can support you in dissolving it.
Many avoid relationships to escape this discomfort, but intimacy offers a gift: the chance to heal and grow. By recognizing and addressing your “dark truths,” you free yourself to live more authentically. This requires maturity and self-awareness to distinguish between who you truly are and the patterns you’ve adopted.
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The Gift of Connection
When two people approach a relationship with the shared goal of growth, transformation becomes exponential. Feedback between them becomes a loving tool: “I say this not to hurt you, but to help you grow.” Such connections refine how we respond to life and each other, always deepening love and understanding.
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Acceptance in Words:
“Okay, thank you, may you be well, I love you.”
These words don’t mean agreement—they mean acceptance. Spoken with love, they hold immense power. We are all mirrors, and in intimate relationships, this reflection is magnified. By embracing what we see, we foster growth and connection.
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Thank you, and may you be well. I love you.
Shel-xpressions 